End of a year.

It's December 23.
Christmas Eve Eve in my family.
With two days left until Christmas and eight until New Years -
I thought it the perfect time to write one last posting for the year.

I'm not sure what else to say that hasn't already been shared.

Ryan and I continue to reflect on our journey this past year.
The roller coaster ride we have called life.
It's been confusing.
Hard.
Hopeless.
Hopeful.
Tight.
Disappointing.
Relieving.
Scary.
Exciting.
Painful.
Promising.
But most importantly, right now -- it's peaceful.

Peace has reigned in our hearts throughout it all.
Despite our questions of whys, and whats---we have never once questioned if God was with us.
His peace has always remained.

Things are not necessarily how we would have ever planned.
Things are not necessarily how we would like to keep them.
But for now, we are thankful for much.

We are thankful for the transition that has happened.
We are thankful for jobs, a home, provisions.
We are thankful for the love of family and friends, who have lifted us up so much.
We are thankful for a healthy, growing son--who is curious, confident, and so loving.
We are thankful for a generous giver, who gave to us financially -- thank you.
We are thankful for others who feel our same sentiment, and are stepping out.
We are thankful for insurance.
We are thankful for vacations.
We are thankful for prayers.
We are thankful for the journey--just as it's been.

No, it hasn't been easy.
No, it hasn't been as planned.
And no, we weren't confident through it all.
This year was a year of refocusing.
Who we are, who we want to be, who we will be should ONLY be defined by HIS desires for us.
This year, God has reminded us that our focus is to be on Him.
A reminder that our calling is based on HIM alone, and what HE desires of us.

We followed HIS desires this year.
Hard to understand.
Hard to comprehend.
Hard to follow.

This year, we gave in 100% to our calling.
Undefined.
Unprepared.
Uncertain.
We followed.

And here we remain.
Wrapping up 2010.
In transition.
Faithfully following.
Comfortably waiting.
Thankful for so much.

I have no idea what 2011 will bring.
I never would have guessed what 2010 was going to present.
Despite everything, here we are.
In the middle.
In the quiet.
Preparing for Christmas.
Reflecting on a journey unfolding daily.
Hopeful in the plan that God has dreamed for us.
Inspired not to settle for anything less.
We end 2010
Hopeful.
Rested.
Waiting.
and Peaceful.

May the peace of the Father find you and yours this Holiday season.
May you be challenged in 2011 to step out and follow HIS dreams and desires for you.
If you are out in His will, find comfort knowing you are not alone.
In 2010--we stepped out into God's plan for us.
In 2011, the journey will surely continue to unfold--
stay tuned.

Peaceful in His will,
The Stevensons

Trust the Process

This weekend Ryan and I had the amazing opportunity to join other young leaders for a weekend conference.  Logistically we were thankful, it was only 24 hours and here in Sacramento. Eli stayed with my parents allowing us time to reflect on, and really defrag the last six months.
We enjoyed every moment of the retreat, and really felt God confirm many area's of our lives.
During the conference, the speaker (Chris Conrad) made a statement that has lingered with me.  While talking about times of change and transition, Chris said, "Trust the Process."
Sometimes things aren't as they were planned.
Sometimes our dreams don't work out as we hoped they would be.
Sometimes what we think life will bring....is the complete opposite.
Ryan and I still don't know what's next for us in ministry.
We are still being asked by others weekly.
We are still feeling the tugs to move forward on something.
We are still very much aware that people are "waiting" on us.
BUT--
we are waiting too.
We are in the process.
God has yet to speak.
He has yet to point us in the direction HE wants us to go.
We don't know why.
We know we are in HIS will and we are OK with that.
Ryan is in LA for his final training with FARMERS these next few weeks.
Not sure why Farmers, or where that will lead--but once again we are "trusting the process."

Trust is a hard thing.
It's earned.
God has earned our trust with his faithfulness time and time again in our lives.
This process has been one of the most stretching, painful, and growing experiences we have ever faced individually, spiritually and as a family.
We know it will not be in vein.
We trust in a big God who is mighty.
His plans are not our plans...and so we wait.
Trusting the process, one day at a time.